Expectations

It is a normal, healthy thing to have high expectations of yourself.  Having those high expectations is both a blessing and curse.  It is not enough to have them, that alone will not make you successful.  Learning that you have to constantly manage your expectations is key to being able to manage multiple expectations at one time.

Managing your expectations does NOT mean that you need to lower them, ignore them or forget about them.  Managing them is one of those essential life skills.

Every expectation has a weight attached to it.  High expectations have a lot of weight attached to them.  And when you reach the point (and we all do) that you believe you are not meeting one or more expectations...those are the heaviest of all.   Unless you learn how to manage your expectations you will get crushed under the weight of them.

So here are the key points to managing your expectations.

*There are aspects of your expectations that you simply cannot control.  People that you are depending on will come up short occasionally and you will have to adjust to that.  There are things that you cannot overcome by sheer will alone.  The ability to adapt (adjusting) is a key life skill.  Forgive the people who have come up short, put it in perspective, and adjust.  To your perspective employers, peers,  significant others, friends and acquaintances this is a critical skill that tells them a lot about you.  You would pick the person that can roll with things, everyone would.  In the scheme of things that is more important than never having things go to hell.

*Balance, balance, balance.  Every single day is about meeting multiple expectations.  Never get so focused on one that you exclude all of the others.

*Listen closely to the way you talk about yourself.   Negative talk and thoughts are easy to start and hard to stop.  People listen carefully to how you talk about yourself, for a lot of people this is an extension of how they expect to be treated by you. 

*Don't be afraid to look at a missed expectation and examine it.  LEARN from it.  If you are going to whip yourself with it, you are wallowing in some self pity.   There is a reason they call it LEARNING instead of KNOWING.

If you ever feel like you got your ass kicked, never let it stay kicked.  Clock resets everyday at 00:00.  It is a new day then.  Make the world kick your ass every day.

Love Dad