Breaking up will always suck. You will end up riding this really crappy roller coaster of be glad you are out and missing the hell out of the person you just broke up with.
It is not easy for anyone regardless of age or life experience. If it easy, then something is broken with you. But, there are things that you need to do to move on.
It is natural to remember all the great things about that person and forget some of the pain in the ass things. You should remember the person with the good and bad. No one person is a complete piece or shit or a saint. Like the rest of us mortals, they fall somewhere in between. Most people you are involved with will show you something about yourself that is important. Again, you should remember the bad and the good things you found in yourself when you were with the person. I have said this before but god bless every woman before mom for not working out.
Nothing is worse than having sudden large gaps in your life. You have to take a hard look at those gaps and start to fill them up with routine things. As hokey as it sounds, regular exercise programs, healthy diet (might be the time to learn a new skill - cooking), and routine meetings and get together's help a great deal. If you don't have them in your life, now is a great time to put them there. Most important endeavors are helped along with the love and care of family and friends. You have these in great abundance.
The pain starts to ease when you talk about it bit by bit and look at it for what it is - Stockholm Paradox. You must retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties. AND at the same time…You must confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be. Combine your sincere belief with brutal honesty and a strong willingness to take action. Cannot emphasize that enough..you have to have a STRONG willingness to take the action to change
It very much like the lid of a pressure cooker. Never take the lid off quickly (you will bet burned) or wait until it builds up so badly it becomes dangerous. You cannot remove pain with any amount of liquor or drugs, it postpones it and adds incrementally to the pain. Again, you have the love of family and friends who are all queued up to help you. Let them know how they can help, you will find a willingness there that is going to surprise and flatter you.
It very much like the lid of a pressure cooker. Never take the lid off quickly (you will bet burned) or wait until it builds up so badly it becomes dangerous. You cannot remove pain with any amount of liquor or drugs, it postpones it and adds incrementally to the pain. Again, you have the love of family and friends who are all queued up to help you. Let them know how they can help, you will find a willingness there that is going to surprise and flatter you.
Last but certainly not least. At the end of all of your good days and bad ones you are going to have to be able to look everyone in the eye. Remember the hard and fast rule. You have to get your ass kicked every 24 period for it to stay kicked. Never make the mistake of kicking your own ass. Make someone or something kick it every frigging day and stand up and dare the world to kick your ass.
Love Dad
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