Participant Trophies

I was helping Mom look for her passport and found some of your old soccer "Participant" trophies in the closet.  Those participant trophies never made any sense to me, then or now.  To make matters worse, it continues into middle school when they give ribbons or medals for everyone who participates in an event or sport.

I think all those participant awards have left you both a little jaded.  When you both started to get real recognition for your very real accomplishments, you tended to consider them like all those participant trophies. 

We should have just stuck with juice boxes and unhealthy snacks.  Pizza and team pictures at the end of the year.  Parents really have the best intentions.  In our hearts we justify this by thinking that trophy will instill a sense of what it takes to be a winner.  It does not do that at all, like a lot of things in the early years, it is as much for us as it is for you.

You begin to get a real appreciation for winning when you experience losing.  Parents start realizing this more in high school where there seems to be more of a natural selection process.  In your chosen disciplines in high school you both legitimately excelled.  **A disclaimer here..that is not just a Dad thing.  That is your names on those walls.  The teachers and coaches who still hold you out as the standard**.

College and you both are hitting your stride.  Those wins that you have racked up there.  Well they aren't frigging "participant trophies" are they?  They are you busting your asses and breaking through to get some very impressive wins.  Go ahead tell me those internships, those grades, aren't anything.  I double dog dare you.

So make sure you celebrate those wins.  Every celebration does not have to be epic but you have to acknowledge that you came out on top.  It is such an important reference point and milestone.  You only realize how far you have come, when you know where you started.  Keep track of those milestones.

You both have inherited your mom's humility and grace so I know your celebrations will always be a little understated.  I give you permission to tell the world from time to time that you have just kicked its ass.  Say it out loud, it always feels better to say that out loud.

Also, there is a universal rule that if you end up getting your ass kicked, that an ass kicking only lasts for a 24 hour period.   During those tough spells make the world kick your ass every single day.  Never let it stay "kicked"

Hey, mom's birthday is coming up.  You know you she is a pure sucker for a hand written card from you.